Video - Silent Struggles: A Man's Journey Through Unseen Pain

As a man, I always feel that i can't express anything. Iv'e tried a couple of times to talk about my feelings with really close friends or my sister, but nobody really cares. Ill start with something along the lines of "i haven't been doing well lately" and nobody cares. What makes it worse is that i can't even talk to my parents about my thoughts. They mentally abuse my middle child sister and I and used to abuse my oldest sister before she turned 18. This got me into doing drugs and i would wake up in my bed crying after taking heavy doses. Ive gotten better, but it still isn't good. I took a depression test the other day and it said i had severe depression and i needed to seek help. I just thought "who's gonna care anyway." I bottle down my feelings and don't show them because when i do, im talked down to. Im told that im crazy and that im always happy all the time so what's wrong. I have thought of suicide, but i don't want to do it. I can persevere.